Every now and then my husband and I will be talking about weddings, events or even portrait sessions. As we are always working on improving our services to our customers. With those discussions we will often say “this would make a great blog entry!” Well, we are finally starting a series of wedding day tips that we will post on our blog for you to take and use as you desire.
Since we have many brides and grooms who often tell us they don’t want to see each other before the ceremony. We decided to open with the pros and cons of doing a reveal as compared to not seeing each other until ceremony. First we will start with not seeing each other prior to the ceremony.
There’s only one reason really why people don’t want to see each other prior – “it’s tradition” and considered by some as ‘unlucky’. How did this tradition start and why is it considered unlucky?
This goes back to the days when wives were considered property and marriages were arranged. Many times the groom had never seen the bride until the wedding. This is also where the tradition of wearing a veil came about. The whole idea was so he couldn’t see her until the marriage was a ‘done deal’ so he couldn’t bolt and leave her at the alter in case she was less than lovely. If he bolted this could result in wars and blood feuds causing it to be unlucky indeed. Not a tradition that is exactly flattering to the bride in our modern world.
Another concern is they will lose the aisle ‘wow’ factor. Trust us, the magic of the moment won’t be lost! I’ve seen plenty of grooms tear up even after they had a reveal and were doing all their portraits. There is nothing like seeing a bride walking down the aisle with her dad.
While we respect those who choose to stick with tradition, we do have work a-rounds, that we can recommend to get all your portraits completed. It requires careful planning and sticking to a schedule. One thing delaying the timing can effect the entire day!
Why do a reveal? The biggest reason we hear from past brides is getting to see the grooms expression! Brides who didn’t have a reveal admitted afterwards they didn’t see the grooms expression because they were concerned about tripping over their dress, they were distracted by guest cameras flashing, and generally trying to keep calm. Because walking down the aisle is drawn out affair, by the time you get close enough to him, his thoughts are on the next steps of the ceremony. His first expression was when you were beyond being able to see it!
You can see how this reveal allowed us to capture the look of anticipation upon the grooms face as he reaches to draw his bride out for his first sight of her and the joy on his face when he sees how stunning she looks.
At a reveal, it’s intimate and you have that chance to savoir the moment and see his expression of delight as he sees you for the first time. I’ve seen many grooms who were moved to tears that would’ve been wiped clean or gone by the time the bride made it to the alter.
We’ve heard from couples that the reveal actually helped them calm their nerves and reminded them what brought them to that moment and allowing them that brief moment of time to be together without all the demands from families, friends and guests all vying for their attention.
Getting all the portraits done before has other benefits. First, the day smoothly transitions from the ceremony to the reception. You aren’t leaving the guests waiting. Have you been to a wedding where you had to wait an hour or LONGER for the bride & groom to make their appearances? As a general rule plan on it taking one to one and a half hours for all the formals. Guests simply don’t appreciate the long wait and besides that they are eager to congratulate you and celebrate your marriage!
Again, this can effect a timing issue for those who don’t have the reveal. If the ceremony runs late for any reason (and most often they do), then either portrait time gets reduced and becomes stressful for all involved which means you lose those memories forever OR the portraits run late due to the ceremony running late and now the caterer has food that is ready to serve and the bridal party isn’t there yet.
On a final note, we’ve often heard a bride mention that she wishes they had done a reveal instead of waiting for the ceremony. We’ve never heard a bride mentioning that she had second thoughts about having done the reveal.
253-970-5689 ~ info@familyaffairphotography.com ~ www.familyaffairphotography.com
